The great are only great because we are on our knees – let us rise!



Please note the items you are about to read consist largely of scurrilous gossip, vicious back-stabbing and idle speculation.
As Jon Stewart might say, its stories are not fact checked. Its informants are not journalists. And its opinions are not fully thought through.

Nov 30. Business news: Iron Maiden’s company Iron Maiden LLP has been named as one of the fastest growing music firms in the UK. In a report published yesterday by the London Stock Exchange, Maiden’s holding company were shown to be easily outperforming other businesses in the sector, turning over up to £20 million a year. Hmm. Maybe it’s time we floated the Gonads on the Stock Exchange. Better have a look at the books, they’re bound to be in order. Col! Col? Where’s he gone?

Our last financial adviser was Martin Sporrell. He used to have a corner on the market, now he’s by the market on the corner, busking…

Fat Col’s passing witticism: surely it’s only a matter of time before Apple release the iMaiden?

OUT this week, a shed-load of vinyl re-releases including Blitz’s Voice Of A Generation and the Vibrators Under The Radar (fting Pat Collier) from Pagajuv Hlasatel Records; and Conflict’s Time To See Who’s Who from Radiation Reissues. Radiation have also re-released Blitz’s Time Bomb – 23 tasty tracks including the All Out Attack ep.

Random guff: Green Day played the annual salesforce.com Dreamforce expo this month. So much for those punk roots… The Gaslight Anthem’s Live In London DVD is released on 17th December… Anti-Flag are celebrating their 20th anniversary by releasing their label A-F Records’ entire catalogue as a pay-what-you-want download (or as Col says for free). The offer is good all week. Find the goodies here.

Nov 28. Doctor Punk is OUT - and here's the proof in plastic. The brilliant ep by DMG and Maninblack is limited to just 500 copies - 400 in Tardis blue and 100 black. (Black and blue, eh? just how Fat Col likes his lap-dancers...)

The Gonads Website

Also out from Randale: two Toy Dolls LPs - 'Classic Album' and 'Our Last Album'; the Angelic Upstarts/Crashed Out split LP, the Evil Conduct/Marching Orders split single, Toughskins' 'Keep The Faith' single and the Evil Conduct/Old Firm Casuals Xmas split single...

Nov 27. A new sport is gripping visitors to Nads HQ: Punk-Celebrity Beagle Racing. Here’s how it works, the punk or celeb grandee turns up at the door and pretends to accidentally release Charlie the Beagle into the street. Hilarity ensues as they then race to catch him. Times to date include Steve Whale: 7 minutes 43 seconds, Paul Hallam (Stalin of Style) 13 minutes 12 seconds, Liam from Donkey Laugh 4 minutes 15 seconds. Tomorrow: Cheryl Baker? Or just someone who looks like her? You never know your luck. The only visitor not to race Charlie was the PM. Says Fit Bird: “When they met there was a stillness in the room, a mutual respect shared by two beings at the very top of their game, know what I mean?” Not really.

Time for action – and re-action! Gal interviewed Ian Page and Dave Cairns from Secret Affair last night for his Radio Litopia show. It’s cracking stuff. We’ll let you know when it’s up. Meanwhile there’s a brand new Gonads interview (done a week ago) on-line here.

Misc News: pop-punk blighters Masked Intruder will release a Xmas single called ‘Under The Mistletoe’ on Fat Wreck Chords (out 10/12)... The English beat have signed for SkaMouth 2014...Brody Dalle has recorded her first solo album featuring guest appearances from Nick Valensi of the The Strokes and Garbage’s Shirley Manson... but the strangest collaboration is Green Day's Billie Joe Armstrong and Norah Jones who have released an Everly Brothers tribute album called Foreverly. Billie Joe told our man on the West Coast: “We didn’t tell anybody we were making this record, not even our label. We were just a couple of friends playing music together.” He went on: “I'm a big vinyl collector, so I was just flipping through the bins and I found an album called Songs Our Daddy Taught Us” - an LP of traditional songs recorded by The Everlys – “I thought it would be cool to remake the record. But I thought it would be cool to do it with a woman.” (No ‘Fat Col also thinks it’s cool to do it with a woman’ remarks, by order of t’committee)

Nov 26. Big news: 2014 will see the publication of PUNK ROCK WILL NEVER DIE – The True Story Of The Gonads. This lavishly illustrated, authorised guide will include juicy revelations, outrageous anecdotes, scores of lyrics, 37 years of changing band members, a celebration of our flag girls, the band’s true history, cartoons, our full discography, groupie confessions, memories of Pink Tent, shocking band riders, and much much more. It’ll be published by those magnificent bastards at Countdown Books. More details when we feel like it. And now, some old cobblers from Fat Col...

The Gonads Website

Wotcha dodgers, Fat Col here with an exclusive Punk Rock Christmas update. This is exactly what we’ve got left in store as of 9am this morning: TEN copies of the Built For Destruction album on CD and FIVE on vinyl; three copies of Hooligan Classics Vol 2 vinyl 7inch, one final vinyl copy of the Charlton Boys e.p., and one last copy of Gal’s Just The Filth album. We also have ONE copy of the 30 Years Of Oi compilation on vinyl, and our own Greater Hits Vol 2: The Mutt’s Nuts is still in stock. So get ordering quick to avoid Christmas disappointment.

Here’s Wattsie out on the town auditioning SkaNads backing singers... we’ll have Carol Harrison (far left) please, with a side order of Kara Tointon.

The Gonads Website
Wattsie, second left: she looks like Mistress Material allegedly.

Nov 25. Up and coming London shows alert: the Voice Of Oi! Weekender will run on the 13th and 14th June 2014. The organisers are promising/threatening two solid days of Oi-Oi music punctuated by a pinch of Ska. Bands will include Perkele, Argy Bargy, Booze & Glory (their only UK show next year), Buster Shuffle, the excellent Lion’s Law, Runnin’ Riot, the Black Marias and Grade2 who are described as “the new breed of British Oi!” and who like several transsexuals known to Sharon Stiletto have 15-year-old members. Ticket details will be announced soon, places limited to 300. Before that there’s a Punk Fest on 25th January at the New Cross Inn with 999, Night Of Treason, Crash Course, Foreign Legion, On Trial, the Skoisters and more... the bands alone should fill the gaff!

The Rejects tour is going from strength to strength. Richie Rocker saw them in Ashton last night and reports: “The Cockney Rejects were superb tonight... This band are on fire right now, get down and see ’em.” Their UK tour ends this Friday at the London Punk Fest. Great Jeff Turner interview in Street Sounds.

The East End Badoes have called off their planned reunion, as one member had to decorate his daughter’s drum and another had to do up his daughter’s place for a baby shower. Rock’n’roll... this isn’t. We fully expect their next set, if they ever play one, to include covers of ‘Paint It Black’ and ‘When Father Papered The Parlour’. All together: “I’ll repair for you, when the rain starts to pour...”

STOP PRESS: The Offspring have been added to the Download 2014 bill. The Donington Park fest will be headlined by Aerosmith, Linkin Park and Avenged Sevenfold, and will take place between 13th and 15th June. Other recent signings include Status Quo and Steel Panther, a parody metal band (Wasn’t that The Darkness? – Ed). Newly announced bands include Trivium, In Flames, While She Sleeps, The Black Dahlia Murder, Letlive, Miss May I, Blessthefall and Dying Foetus.

Nov 24. Gal’s podcast is up and running now, at Bloodstock Radio. The Harrington Saints tracks are particularly fine, hitting like George Groves in round one.

Lemmy says he’s felt depressed since his new pacemaker was fitted. The op forced Motorhead to postpone their European tour until next Feb. Lemmy told the New York Times yesterday that he feels “really down”, adding that the pacemaker means “I’ll never get a job again. I’m paying for the good times, I suppose. It’s a mixture of all the things I ever did — and I did plenty.” He has now given up smoking and vodka. “I drink wine and that's it,” he growls. Yeah, but what do you do after breakfast, Lem?

Nov 23. Gal recorded his latest Bloodstock radio podcast yesterday with hot new songs from DMG, The Warriors, The Harrington Saints, The Skoidats, Marmalade Sky, The Goddamn Electric, The Bermondsey Joyriders, Buster’s All-Stars, The Crunch, The Ganders, Section 60, The Riffs, Buster’s Ska Battalion, King Hammond and Monkish. Studio guests are Garrie Lammin and Terry Rawlings author of a new book about the highly dodgy death of Rolling Stones legend Brian Jones... the show should be up by Monday. Says Fit-Bird “Bloodstock have moved from Arfur Daley’s lock-up to a bunker under a bleedin’ ’eavy metal pub in NW1. Malcolm Dome sits there all day lookin’ up at the ceiling and praying for leakage... ”

The Gonads Website
Better the devil you know... renowned rock scribe Malcolm Dome
mans the bar at Bloodstock’s new very metal HQ...

Unfortunately the demon-heavy HM imagery in the Cape Of Good Hope offended La Lammin who led a post show walk out to the near-by Queen’s Head & Artichoke, saying “Turning crosses upside down is as offensive to Christians as what Hitler did to the Hindu swastika.” Fat Col backs him all the way. “Satanism ruined my life,” he tells us. “The greatest trick the Devil ever played was convincing me to marry her.” Oaf.

Can we buy the DMG ‘Doctor Punk’ ep on vinyl now, ask a thousand eager readers? Yes, we reply, if you’ve got an effing Tardis and can trek into whatever distant point in the far-off future that Randale decide to deliver the bloomin’ records... (You’ll notice odd words on this blog these days, that’s because Waistrel has signed us up to the Campaign for a Return to 1950s Cussing). Cripes!

Nov 22. So we get interview questions through from a punk fanzine and the first one suggests that 2013 has not been one of our busier years. Are they taking the piss? We never stop! We’ve had three singles and an album out this year – the split e.p. with the Uprisers, our track on the Hooligan Classics e.p. and the DMG ‘Doctor Punk’ split single with Maninblack, plus the 16-track Glorious Bastards LP. We’ve even played a few gigs. What more do you want from us, you whip-cracking slave-driving bastards?

The Gonads Website
The Gonads live at SkaMouth: working so hard, Wattsie fell asleep on her feet.

Congratulations to our New York brother band Maninblack on reaching #1 on the ReverbNation charts for Punk in the NYC.

Former Clash members Mick Jones and Paul Simonon giving Billboard their reasons for not reforming the band. Paul: “It's a better story at the end of the day that we didn't get back together. We saved all that time and effort by not reforming. It seems like we would have squandered what we'd achieved by reforming. Why do people get together? Why do bands reform? Oh, they're good mates. Well, that's nice. It's usually because of a financial situation that has to be adhered to. Basically, everyone's broke.” Mick: “Our band is an idea as well. It kind of said, `You can do this.' We can say all this now in retrospect and sort of understand it. When we did it, we just did it instinctively with no thought of future significance.”

OUT for Christmas: This moving Gal Gonad action figure. Unfortunately we’re having to send it back to the manufacturers WCW (that’s Wang, Clunge & Waistrel) because they’ve forgotten the blinking tattoos.

The Gonads Website
Gal Doll: hunky, chunky, punky eh girls?

Also out now: Menace’s 2011 album Too Many Punks Are Dead released on vinyl for the first time by Rebel Sounds... NOFX’s ‘Stoke Extinguisher’ ep (Fat Wreck Chords) and the Dead Boys’ ‘Last Stand 1980’ 7" single featuring ‘Son Of Sam’, ‘Third Generation Nation’, and ‘All This And More’ on the Ugly Pop label.

out next month, from Black Hole Records, the latest Cashing In On Christmas comp which packs in tracks from Angry Snowmans, Bishops Green, BOY, Chem D, Evil Conduct, the Harrington Saints (with a guest appearance by The Dwarves ‘He Who Cannot Be Named’), Hooligan (Dublin), Immoral Discipline, Lion's Law, Maddog Surrender, Missile Toads, our pathetique pals Monkish, On The Job, Prins Carl, Roadside Bombs, Sniper 66, Splodgenessabounds, Stranglehold, Suckered In and The Bad Engrish. How's that for a Christmas party?

Germany’s fiercely Stalinist Mad Butcher drags us up a back alley to reveal his latest wares. These include The Stage Bottles ‘One World, One Crew’ e.p. featuring guest singers Roddy Moreno, Attila the Stockbroker, Enrico from Los Fastidios, Monchi from Feine Sahne Fisch Filet, Thomas from Loikaemie, Fred from Alpi, Sylvain from The Prowlers, Milan from Serbia’s own The Bayonnettes, Oliver from Donkey Laugh, and Igor from Russia’s What We Feel, who have also released an e.p. of their own called ‘To Continue Or Give Up’... a question we ask ourselves every ruddy morning.

Nov 21. The Selecter have announced a 26-date UK tour in February, March and April 2014, performing their seminal debut album ‘Too Much Pressure’ in its entirety… The Too Much Pressure 35th Anniversary Tour will also feature an extended encore of hits and live favorites from across the band’s back catalogue. Pauline Black says: "We thought our 35th anniversary would be the perfect time to revisit our very first album Too Much Pressure and perform it in full… for the very first time! We can't wait to get on the road to bring our message of multiculturalism from across four decades to venues up and down the land. See you there!" The full dates are: 27th Feb Guildhall Gloucester; 28th Feb Princess Pavilion Falmouth; 1st March O2 Academy Liverpool; 2nd March O2 Academy Sheffield; 6th March Komedia Bath; 7th March Pavilion Exmouth; 8th March Wedgewood Rooms Portsmouth; 9th March O2 Academy Oxford; 13th March O2 Academy Birmingham; 14th March 229 Club London; 15th March The Globe Cardiff; 16th March Old Fire Station Bournemouth; 20th March Assembly Leamington Spa; 21st March Rock City Nottingham; 22nd March Brudenell Leeds; 23rd March Sub 89 Reading; 27th March Trades Club Hebdon Bridge; 28th March Brickyard Carlisle; 29th March Windsor Hotel Kirkcaldy; 30th March ABC2 Glasgow; 3rd April The Square Harlow; 4th April Open Norwich; 5th April Concorde 2 Brighton; 11th April Band On The Wall Manchester; 12th April The Grand Clitheroe; 13th April O2 Academy Newcastle…

Talking Ska, don’t forget this is happening next August, people…

The Gonads Website

Political News: Leader ‘JK’ has imposed a news blackout on the fledgling People’s Party Of Great Britain, which threatens to launch next year - although our sources reveal that the PPGB may be lining up branches in Normandy, France, Marbella, Spain, Vancouver, Canada, Christchurch, New Zealand, Sydney, Australia, Rye, New York, and Hoboken, New Jersey. Whispers an insider: “There are many potential affiliates overseas. After all, the whole world wants to be British.” The still mysterious PPGB is believed to have roots in the League Of Labour Skins.

Nov 20. Out today! The latest issue of Street Sounds, featuring THE GONADS plus Rick Buckler, Steve Ignorant, the Cockney Rejects, Louise Distras, Mod in Italy, Rebellion, the Spitfires, One-Eyed Baz, SkaMouth and the Bermondsey Joyriders plus the usual columnists, reviews and cartoons. 40 pages all for £2. Quality!

The Gonads Website

Nov 15. Quick news up-date: tomorrow on twitter, you've got three chances to get hold of Gal's new book Face Down for FREE as a download... but be quick, it'll be first come, first served from 8am, then again at 3pm and finally at 7pm.

While we're here, Street Sounds issue five goes to press this weekend and should be on sale by Wednesday... The transcript of Gal's recent jolly chat with Pauline Black is now on-line here, and the brilliant Buster's Ska Battalion ep Ska For Heroes is available as a four-track 12" vinyl at the end of November from here. The handsome picture disc features Buster Bloodvessel and friends including Jennie Bellestar, The Coverup (now P45) opera singer Ben Bevan, and us of course. The title track 'Ska For Heroes' is a magnificent medley of WWI songs. The 4-track bonus e.p. comes with a bonus track - 'Far Away' by Resistance 77 featuring Liberty Hayes. All profits will be split between military charities including H4H and the Erskine Hospital Appeal. Limited Edition, 500 hand-numbered Picture Disc 12" in a Die Cut Sleeve.

The Gonads Website

There are only 29 shop-lifting days left until Xmas, but don't despair, there are still plenty of bargains to be had. Here is our festive guide to the very best punk-oi-Ska delights on the market, compiled by Colin Gannon: "Hello, oi oi, and welcome to Fat Col's Christmas Crackers, and you would be 'crackers' to miss the gems that are still on the market, people. For starters, 1) the script for Join The Rejects, Get Yourself Killed by Garry Bushell and Mick Geggus is available for Kindle etc, this is the words from the movie version of the Cockney Rejects story which has not yet been made but which inspired the East End Babylon documentary film. 2) Also out now, and very strong, the new Last Resort album This Is England: Skinhead Anthems III (Randale Records) 3) The Doctor Punk download tribute single to Doctor Who by DMG and Maninblack. Man, it's heavier than a Cyberman with two Sontarans in a sack: Vinyl copies due any day now. 4) For hardcore lovers, New York City Hardcore: The Way It Is comp has been reissued on colour vinyl by Revelation. This is the definite guide to the NYHC scene in 1988 and includes Bold, Nausea, Warzone, Gorilla Biscuits, Trip 6, Breakdown, Youth Of Today, Sick Of It All, Krakdown, Side By Side, Youth Defense League and Supertouch. Limited to 500 copies. Vinyl version includes download. 5) Best new Ska album around, Ride Again by the Skamanians - original Ska compositions absolutely in the spirit of the 1960s.

Nov 6. The first occasional drop-in. We were going to announce this on January 1st but the hot news has leaked out already, sooo, with great pleasure we can confirm that the Gonads will play Rebellion next August for the first time in about twelve years. It’s over the weekend of 7th to 10th, NOFX and Biohazard are topping the bill, and you can still buy early bird four-day tickets for just £130 from HERE. We will confirm at least two more 2014 festivals on Old Year’s Night...

Last night the fabled Punk Rock Curry Club re-convened in Lee, SE12, with Lars Frederiksen and his wife Steph, Steve Whale, and representatives of a wild array of street-punk heroes – Daryl from Cock Sparrer, Gal, the PM, Mark Wyeth from Symarip, Animal, Robin Guy, Chelsea Dom, Paul ‘Stalin’ Hallam, most of the Last Resort, Iain from Control (bring back Beerzone – Ed), and probably a few more. We forget. Apologies for absence were received from John King, Hoxton Tom, Jeff Turner, Peter Hook, Steve Drewett, Bev Elliott and Manic Esso. Unfortunately the evening was slightly marred by a shocking new development - ‘bill dodgers’. Says an ashen-faced Fat Col: “Some low toads sat there for whole meal eating and drinking and then chucked in a fiver or a tenner and ducked out before the bill arrived driving up the average price for the rest. It’s an effing disgrace.” After consulting with South West London organiser John King (aka J.K. Herbert), the Club has announced that anyone suspected of round dodging or bill swerving will be banned from future events. So mote it be. A proposed ‘whip’ system will be put to the vote before the next outing which will be the Xmas Club meet in Wapping, then it’s onwards to the unchartered regions of Euston, NW1. Yeah – north of the river...

Hello. This blog is largely closed for the rest of the year. Thanks to all of you who read it, come to our shows, and buy our albums. Without YOU we’d be nothing and we genuinely appreciate your support and input. If you want to book the Gonads or the SkaNads for 2014 please email waistrel@the-gonads.co.uk. For clarification, these are two almost entirely different bands playing almost entirely different sets. The Gonads play a largely punk and Oi set with a small sprinkling of Ska, the SkaNads play 90per cent Ska, ten per cent utter lunacy and absolutely no punk. It’s schizophrenia in the key of E, A and occasionally Yale. See you in the New Year.

Quick message from Fat Col: “It’s November and Crystal Palace have three points. I’ve got more than that on me licence.” Nice line, who did he nick that from? (Danny Baker – Ed)

Nov 3. When the annals of Gonads lore are written up, there will surely be a special place in its pages for our glorious return to Charlton last night. The Liberal Club gig turned out to be a scorcher – in spite of the pre-show doom-mongering of one Gal Gonad, the Victor Meldrew of Oi. For despite the absence of such stalwarts as Charlton Tel, Colin Blood, Steve Whale, Fat Col, Big Jim, Micky Billings and (inexcusably) the Charlton Boys, it was a great turn-out and we played not one but two sets betwixt a peerless flow of skinhead reggae and Ska DJ set from Paul Pettit and pals. Set one was: 1) Oi Mate 2) SE7 Dole Day 3) Grant Mitchell 4) I Lost My Love To A UK Sub 5) Punk Rock Till I Die 6) Alconaut 7) Getting Pissed 8) Charlton Boys 9) The Yeti 10) Haemorrhoid (instrumental) 11) Infected 12) England’s Glory 13) FrankenSkin 14) Hey You. Set Two was unexpected, but all the more welcome for that. This consisted of 1) Tucker’s Ruckers 2) Skinhead Girl 3) Oi Mate 4) Stop That Drumming (taking Wattsie completely by surprise) 5) Jobs Not Jails 6) Gob 7) The Growler 8) Valley Floyd Road 9) Lotto 10) Valhallaballoo with an encore of 11) Rob A Bank. That’s 100 minutes of Naddery all told. Our thanks to all who made the show, including FrankenStief, the PM, Paul SkaNad, Sarah Black and many more too numerous to name. Special thanks to flag girl Allyson and to Paul Pettit, the visionary who organised it.

The Gonads Website
Belles of the ball – Wattsie, Sarah Black and Allyson Maverick

The Gonads Website
Stief forces Gal off stage during FrankenSkin. Our advice? Mouthwash...

The Gonads Website
Gal looks in horror as Wattsie refuses to “swallow” during ‘Getting Pissed’

The Gonads Website
Poster boi Gal – Halloween comes late

If you missed it, tough because this was your last chance to see the Gonads in a small club. We’re not joking. Next year – aside from the gig we owe folk in Burslem – it’s strictly big events for us. This blog returns properly with all the gen on January 1st 2014 (although we may be back beforehand with occasional snippets). Stay strong, stay free, skank hard and remember: There will always be an England, while there’s a Cockney. One love. Up The Addicks!

PS. We’ve just been told we did ‘Badly Done’ as well in the second set... that two of the band are now officially signed up to appear in Gatwick Gangsters... and if Dave Williams gets in touch we’ll tell him which band member brazenly stole his pint...

Random News: Plans are already in place for next year’s Specialised event – and will be announced around Xmas time. Park Dean want the fest back, and it will happen between the 14th and 17th November 2014... Captain Oi have issued a brand new UK Subs picture disc vinyl limited edition. The studio albums Work In Progress and XXIV have been given the Captain Oi Picture Disc treatment and will form part of a series of four (they’re doing the same for albums Y and Z), However, the pic discs are strictly limited to just 250 so these could turn out to be some of the most collectable UK SUBS discs for many a long year... Our old pal HM DJ Krusher Joule will star in a new UK comedy horror film called Meet The Cadavers. Written, produced, co-directed and starring Spit Like This vocalist Lord Zion, Cadavers is said to be a modern take on classic shows like The Munsters and The Addams Family.

Sad news from Robin George - legendary Blues guitar player Pete Haycock passed away on Wednesday night. Pete was most famous for his time in The Climax Blues Band; especially for his self-penned massive worldwide hit ‘Couldn’t Get it Right’. Robin adds: “We had just finished our new album, and were looking forward to touring together with our superb band who have been working with us for the last 5 years, firstly on The ‘LovePower and Peace’ sharing project, closely followed by ‘Broke Heart Blues’ which Pete envisaged as the new true Climax Blues Band recordings. Alex, Pete’s widow, has asked me to make sure this album is released in Pete’s memory. Pete was ready to reclaim his legacy with this fantastic work; new ground for both Pete and me. He was playing and singing as well as always, as recently as last week. ‘Broke Heart Blues’ is a heart-breaking title for me now, but Pete’s countless fans deserve to hear his last fabulous performances. Professional to the end, Pete stayed with us long enough to finish the album. I listened to ‘Broke Heart Blues’ last night and the words he sang from the heart and his stunning guitar work overwhelmed me. This album will be dedicated to my co-writer and producer Pete Haycock, and hopefully will help his name live on. If he wasn’t the best Blues guitar player in the world, he was definitely in the top one!”


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